Thread: The Dictionary..
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Old 13-08-2010, 12:38 PM
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Raheel Raheel is offline
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Exclamation The Dictionary..
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CIGARETTE:
A pinch of tobacco
rolled in paper
with fire at one end
and a fool at the other!

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MARRIAGE:
It's an agreement
wherein
a man loses his bachelor degree

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DIVORCE:
Future Tense
of Marriage

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LECTURE:
An art of transmitting Information
from the notes of the lecturer
to the notes of students
without passing through the minds
of either

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CONFERENCE:
The confusion of one man
multiplied by the
number present

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COMPROMISE:
The art of dividing
a cake in such a way that
everybody believes
he got the biggest piece

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TEARS:
The hydraulic force by which
masculine will power is
defeated by feminine water-power!

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DICTIONARY:
A place where divorce comes
before marriage

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CONFERENCE ROOM:
A place where everybody talks,
nobody listens
and everybody disagrees later on

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ECSTASY:
A feeling when you feel
you are going to feel
a feeling
you have never felt before

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CLASSIC:
A book
which people praise but never read

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SMILE:
A curve
that can set
a lot of things straight!

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OFFICE:
A place
where you can relax
after your strenuous
home life

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YAWN:
The only time
when some married men
ever get to open
their mouth

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ETC:
A sign
to make others believe
that you know
more than
you actually do

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COMMITTEE:
Individuals
who can do
nothing individually
and sit to decide
that nothing can be done
together

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EXPERIENCE:
The name
men give
to their
Mistakes

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ATOM BOMB:
An invention
to bring an end
to all
inventions

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PHILOSOPHER:
A fool
who torments himself
during life,
to be spoken of
when dead

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DIPLOMAT:
A person
who tells you
to go to hell
in such a way
that you actually look forward
to the trip

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OPPORTUNIST:
A person
who starts taking bath
if he
accidentally falls
into a river

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OPTIMIST:
A person
who while falling
from EIFFEL TOWER
says in midway
"SEE I AM NOT INJURED YET!"

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PESSIMIST:
A person
who says that
O is the last letter
in ZERO,
Instead of the first letter
in OPPORTUNITY

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MISER:
A person
who lives poor
so that
he can die RICH!

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FATHER:
A banker
provided by
nature

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CRIMINAL:
A guy
no different
from the other,
unless he gets caught

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BOSS:
Someone
who is early
when you are late
and late
when you are early

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POLITICIAN:
One who
shakes your hand
before elections
and your Confidence
Later

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DOCTOR:
A person
who kills
your ills
by pills,
and kills you by bills.


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