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Old 15-02-2010, 05:55 PM
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Read 30 Facts About Men


1. Why does a man have a clear conscience?
Because itís never used.

2. Why are men so happy?
Because ignorance is bliss.

3. Why is psychoanalysis a lot quicker for a man then for a
women?
Because when itís time to go back to childhood, heís already
there.

4. If a man and a woman fell off a 10-story building at the same
time,who would reach the ground first?
The woman, the man would get lost.

5. How are men like commercials?
You canít believe a word either one of them says and they both
last about 60 seconds.

6. How do men exercise at the beach?
By sucking in their stomachs every time they see a woman in a
bikini.

7. What do you call a man with half a brain?
Gifted.

8. Whatís the difference between government bonds and men?
Bonds mature.

9. What did God say after creating man?
I can do better.

10. What are two reasons why men donít mind their own business?
1. No mind. 2. No business.

11. What do you call an intelligent man in America?
A tourist.

12. If men got pregnant Ö.
Psychiatric Services and serious pain killers would be available
in convenience stores and drive-through windows.

13. Did you hear about the man who won the gold medal at the
Olympics?
He had it bronzed.

14. What is gross stupidity?
144 men in one room.

15. How many men does it take to pop popcorn?
Three. One to hold the pan and two others to show off and shake
the stove.

16. How do men sort their laundry?
ďFilthyĒ and ďFilthy but Wearable.Ē

17. Only a man would buy a $500 car and put a $4000 stereo in it.

18. What does a man consider to be quality time with his wife?
Pulling the sheets over her head and saying, ďGreat chili, Babe!Ē

19. A woman of 35 thinks of having children. What does a man of
35 think of?
Dating children.

20. What should you give a man who has everything?
A woman to show him how to work it.

21. Why do black widow spiders kill their males after mating?
To stop the snoring before it starts.

22. Why donít men have mid-life crises?
They stay stuck in adolescence.

23. How does a man show heís planning for the future?
He buys two cases of beer instead of one.

24. How is being at a singles bar different from going to the
circus?
At the circus the clowns donít talk.

25. What makes men chase women they have no intention of
marrying?
The same urge that makes dogs chase cars they have no intention
of driving.

26. What do you do with a bachelor who thinks heís Godís gift?
Exchange him.

27. Why do bachelors like smart women?
Opposites attract.

28. Why are husbands like lawn mowers?
Theyíre hard to get started, emit foul odors, and donít work half
the time.

29. Whatís the difference between a new husband and a new dog?
After a year, the dog is still excited to see you.

30. What is the thinnest book in the world?
What Men Know About Women.
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