Dana Perino
"We did not have a terrorist attack on our country during President Bush's term.
Ms. Teen South Carolina 2007
"I personally believe, that US Americans are unable to do so, because some people out there, in our nation, don't have that, and eh I believe that our education, like such as in South Africa, and the Iraq, everywhere like such as, and I believe that they should, our education over here, in the US, should help the US, or should help South Africa, and should help the Iraq and the Asian countries, so we will be able to build up our future... for our children."
Arnold Schwarzenegger
“I think gay marriage is something that should be between a man and a woman.”
Michele Bachmann
"This is an earthquake issue. This will change our state forever. Because the immediate consequence, if gay marriage goes through, is that K-12 little children will be forced to learn that homosexuality is normal, natural and perhaps they should try it."
Britney Spears: Overseas
"I get to go to lots of overseas places, like Canada."
George W. Bush: OB-GYNS
"Too many good docs are getting out of the business. Too many OB-GYNs aren't able to practice their love with women all across this country."
Jessica Simpson
"Is this chicken what I have or is this fish? I know it's tuna, but it says chicken.
Sarah Palin: Quitting
"It may be tempting and more comfortable to just keep your head down, plod along, and appease those who demand: 'Sit down and shut up,' but that's the worthless, easy path; that's a quitter's way out." - announcing her resignation as governor.
Paris Hilton
"I'm so smart now. Everyone is always like, 'Take your top off.' Sorry, no! They always want to get that money shot. I'm not stupid."
R. Kelly
"All of a sudden, you're like the Bin Laden of America. Osama Bin Laden is the only one who knows exactly what I'm going through."
Rush Limbaugh
"Exercise freaks ... are the ones putting stress on the health care system."
George W. Bush: Fool Me Once
"There's an old saying in Tennessee — I know it's in Texas, probably in Tennessee — that says, fool me once, shame on — shame on you. Fool me — you can't get fooled again."
Steven Seagal
“People all over the world recognize me as a spiritual leader.”
Christina Aguilera
"Where's the Cannes Film Festival being held this year?"
Kanye West
“I realize that my place and position in history is that I will go down as the voice of this generation, of this decade. I will be the loudest voice.”
Ted Stevens
"The Internet is not something that you just dump something on. It's not a big truck. It's a series of tubes.
Britney Spears: Japan
"I've never really wanted to go to Japan. Simply because I don't like eating fish. And I know that's very popular out there in Africa."
David Hasselhoff
"I've got taste. It's inbred in me."
George W. Bush: Misunderestimated
“They misunderestimated me”